I\’m trying to figure this out. Education.

I have two bachelor\’s degrees. Liberal Studies and Accounting. I\’m an engineer by profession, having started as a technician and worked my way up. If I want to progress beyond this stage it\’s not required to have a degree, but it\’s unusual.

I might have written about that before.

Anyway, I\’ve been trying to help someone close to me, who has no degree, and in many ways doesn\’t seem apt to get one. This person is trying to figure out a career and I\’m trying to help them. But I\’ve stressed to them that it doesn\’t matter what your credential is. It matters what you produce. So why, then, do I want to pursue further education?

Part of it, I know, is that it\’s expected in my field. I can\’t even take the professional exam for engineers due to my lack of engineering education. It\’s irritating.

That said, I know I\’d flunk said exam. I\’m not ready for it. I\’m way more ready than I was two years ago, but not there.

The \”entrepreneur\” pipe dream rears its ugly head regularly. It\’s hard to say, \”No, I\’m an employee and I\’m OK with that for now.\” It really is. I think I\’ve got a decent amount of ambition, but I really feel like engineering is where I\’m…called. That\’s who I am. That\’s what I want to be. Science, technology, and being a nerd in the best possible sense is the guy I want to be. It\’s who I identify with. I can fake it in some other realms, and recognize that I have abilities that aren\’t strictly in the typical \”nerd\” pantheon (I.e., writing). But still, that\’s where I find myself wanting to be. That\’s where I find myself being successful. And that\’s where I should remain.

But the question, still, is what do I do educationally? I\’m enrolled in an ABET certified online college in EE. I can take classes. Do I want to? My employer will pay for it entirely. I\’ve paid for the part I need to; they\’ll pay for the rest. But when push comes to shove, and the need arises, I\’m going to need to study. But I have seven kids. And a lovely wife. And other responsibilities. Grrrrrr…. Life is complicated.

I think I\’m going to take the classes and see what happens. May as well try!

Up front, I\’m not doing it because of anything specific they\’ve done. I don\’t care for their charity requests, but that\’s definitely not enough to get me to stop going (just good practice saying no politely). The employees aren\’t a problem either. The food is why I keep coming back, though. I just love it. Savory, sweet, fried, and if you regularly use the receipt to do the survey for a free entree, it\’s a good value. What\’s not to love?

Pain. That\’s what. My body apparently really doesn\’t care for Panda. I noticed the last few times I\’ve gone there that my body is literally sore afterward. Old injuries that haven\’t been hurting suddenly hurt. Weird things hurt, too. Like the top of my left foot. ?!? That had bothered me on our vacation trip, where I ate way too much junk food (including Panda Express), ate more meals than normal, ate sugary cereal, etc., and was also standing more than normal. But it\’d calmed down since I came home. Then, today, out of nowhere it was hurting, my sacroilliac joint was hurting (which hasn\’t in forever), my ankles, and even my knees. If my joints are taking it this poorly, this is something I need to listen to.

It\’d probably is due to the tons of sugar. That\’s my guess, anyway. 4.4 oz serving of SweetFire Chicken, my favorite by far, has 20 grams of sugar. And my guess is that 4.4 oz is one entree, and I get the three entree meal, so I\’m probably getting a dumping of 60 grams of sugar at once, which I pretty much never do otherwise.

The weird thing is that other things don\’t seem to do it in the same way. My foot only started hurting on vacation after Panda. It did it again today. But when I had a ton of ice cream and lemonade, and other father\’s day treats, nothing like this occurred.

Anyway, I\’m mainly writing this for me, so I can have something to go back to and look at to remember why I shouldn\’t go get that tasty deliciousness next time. I don\’t hold this against them. It\’s not their fault. It\’s just not compatible with my system. It\’s yummy to the nines, but it hurts later.

I think I just had a breakthrough.

One issue I think I\’ve struggled with in hitting various goals is that if I\’m doing well hitting the goal, well and good. I get on good runs and have long(ish) periods of success. But if I start failing, I get in this downward spiral of failure and can\’t get out of it until something snaps me back into it.

I think part of this is that I like to plan. So I\’ll say, \”Complete 6 lessons of math per week, come hell or high water.\” Well, that\’s fine when life permits that, but if circumstances beyond my control take over, like when everyone in my family got sick earlier this year, I have trouble getting started again. It\’s hard to complete an entire lesson of math in one day when you\’re out of practice, so I often wouldn\’t even start. And that snowballs, and gets harder and harder to start.

What I\’m going to try instead is having a time-bound goal per day. Instead of \”I\’m going to complete,\” it\’s \”I\’m going to spend x amount of time.\” I\’ll have to play with this to see how it goes, but that seems more doable.

I think this hit me today when I just made myself do some math. I didn\’t figure I\’d get through an entire lesson (and indeed, I did not), but I started, and made real progress. After an hour, since I\’m out of mental shape with that, I was exhausted and ready to quit. I felt bad about that at first, but realized that\’s actually not bad. If I\’d kept going I\’ll bet my error rate would rise, my irritation would rise, and I\’d make little progress. Instead, I\’m just going to embrace that that\’s where I\’m at, stop for the day, then pick back up tomorrow when I\’m fresh. And do an hour then. Eventually, I\’d like to get where it\’s more than an hour. But for now anything is better than nothing.

It has occurred to me more than once that in a blog post I said: \”Editors exist for a reason. Use them.\”

hehe

This book was a mixed bag. It was worth listening to, but it drove me bonkers at times, primarily with its unprofessionalism.

I read some reviews early on that said things like, \”Useless, only has common sense advice.\” Um, if that were true, that\’s hardly a major offense. But it\’s also ridiculous. There were plenty of non-traditional/unpopular ideas in the book.

The parts of this book that I found most helpful were on getting into software development or transitioning into it from a related position. I\’m a test engineer, and it seems that many in my position want to make this change. This book reinforced that all the more. My perception has long been that testers are second-class to software engineers. I think this makes sense, but it\’s not particularly cool when you\’re a tester. That said, it was nice that the book made it clear that this can be a good route into software development, and gave some helpful ideas for getting there that I will doubtless revisit.

The book recommendations seem solid.

The advice about a blog seems…tenuous. On the one hand, I already had this blog and have blogged off and on for years. I am probably the type to continue with that and try to make something of it. On the other, I don\’t think every programmer should be (and in many respects, I don\’t think Sonmez thought that either.

One big issue I had with the book was the motivational speaker aspects. I get the impression that John was transitioning to this life during the book, and it came out strongly more in some sections than in other. It kind of had an atheist irritating-parts-of-Dave Ramsey feel to it to me. I don\’t know much about Tony Robbins, but my guess is that he\’s much like this. It grates on my soul. I really don\’t like it. Much of it has the feel like it really doesn\’t matter what you do as long as you have this weird sort of self-confidence/reliance that many will take to mean you\’re a jerk. It seemed very out of place in a career guide for software engineers. Sure, many engineers I\’ve worked with could probably benefit from understanding negotiation, getting along with people, and having more confidence. But coming across as a bad used car salesman would be counterproductive. And yes, I think many will rightly think you\’re just being a jerk.

The biggest issue I had was related to the previous, but probably a little different. What\’s with throwing the f-word around like an adolescent schoolboy? Does it make you feel tough to talk like Mom\’s not around? Grow up. Be professional. It felt very out-of-place, unbecoming, distracting, and unnecessary.

Finally, I wasn\’t into the \”added value\” comments from John in the audio version were pretty useless. I listen to audio books rather than podcasts in part because I don\’t like bothering with unedited chitchat. Adding in a bunch of filler was largely unhelpful. Editors exist for a reason. Use them.

All of that said, I really would recommend this book for an aspiring software engineer/developer. It was worth listening to, even with its warts.

I\’ve got two drafts related to this already. One is called something like, \”I\”ve decided to be a programmer!1!!\” The other \”Linux programmer.\”

So yes, I\’ve basically decided to pursue programming/software engineering, but it\’s not that simple.

1. Linux hates me.
   1. On my main laptop, it overheats.
   2. On my Chromebook, performance in Linux (GalliumOS) is lame. And the touchpad stops working without cause.
   3. I\’m struggling to get a Python IDE to work with the Python version I want (3.7).
   4. Le sigh.
2. Intellectually, I know that going to Windows and making a working app there first makes sense. BUT I DON\”T WANT TO!
   1. No really, I don\’t want to.

Anyway, Gallium is working mostly, though the performance isn\’t stellar. It\’s good enough to start trying something. Maybe. There\’s definitely part of me that just wants to get Ubuntu/Xubuntu working on my Thinkpad or Chromebook so I can be settled with something my work uses. But that goal might be a bit foolhardy.

There. That\’s enough to publish for now. I\’m working on programming. So help me!

I\’m trying. Really, I am. But it\’s like it\’s fighting me. I tried a bunch of stuff to get my graphics card to quit toasting my leg (laptop) in Xubuntu 19.04, and somehow utterly broke apt. Blah.

After trying various things to fix it, I\’m punting. Trying 18.04 again.

Gotta love it when your IDE or language tells you how to do hello world. Seems kind of pathetic, but there it is:

I don\’t rightly know if this is the IDE (Spyder) or Python itself doing it, but it\’s still funny.

I have a love-hate relationship with Linux. Or maybe hate-love. Well, probably love-hate. Yeah. It\’s complicated.

On the one hand, I \”use\” Linux daily a lot. My cell phone runs Android–a variant of Linux. The primary product I work on for my company runs a version of Linux. Linux is everywhere.

But when I try to run it myself I hate life. I\’m on it at the moment, Xubuntu 18.04. But it\’s always painful. Always.

The mouse was the pain point today. And the display driver. But the mouse was the catastrophic problem. I installed a driver for it, rebooted, and my keyboard quit working in Xubuntu. That was a new one on me. Google rescued me, but still, it was a pain. And the mouse behavior is still very lame.

Not sure what to think. There\’s a part of me that feels like freedom is at hand. I\’ve learned to be content in my job, I\’ve learned to work hard at it (I think), and I can see how I\’m valuable at it in many ways. But reading about entrepreneurship again makes me wistful. There\’s definitely a part of me that would love to have my own business.

Can I make it happen? I don\’t know. I\’m going to think about it. There you go.

Ideas that come to mind: I\’m not disclosing.